Feeling Blessed

God is good.

He has blessed me beyond comprehension.

I have been feeling pretty thankful and decided to make a list of blessings.

(It won't be complete because He is never finished and because there are too many blessings for my human mind to fathom.)

• Life
• The ability to love
• His love
• The love of others
• Family - my mommy, daddy, brudder, and seester(aka my fiffie or baby fra)
• My second family - Becky, Jesús, Amy, Tony, Val, Zach, Hayden, Seth, and Lacey - You guys... I don't even have words to explain how much I love you guys. You all are so wonderful and accepting of me and my eccentricities and I appreciate that so much :)
• My church families - Lakepoint, Countryside, and Emmanuel - (Even though I do not attend Countryside Christian or Emmanuel Bible Church regularly, I would like to thank each and every person I have met for accepting me wholeheartedly when I do come.)
• My friends - I would list you all, but that would be a bit time-consuming ;)
• My choir family - I love you guys, you're the best. Thank you for your help and respect.
• Shelter, Food, and Water

Image found on google images. No copyright intended.

Breathe

Hi, my name is Jennifer Lewis, and I have issues with motivation, time management, and simply being kind and respectful after a long day.

Sometimes, I feel like the world is crumbling beneath me and the sky is falling on top of me until I am crushed and pummeled. This is a completely unrealistic image, though, because I have a pretty darn good life.

When I have those days (or weeks or months) of stress that builds and packs in and takes over my life, what I really need to do is take a step back and breathe.

Over the past six weeks, I have dropped my boyfriend off in Washington at Pacific Lutheran University with his mom and sister (two of the most amazing ladies in my life whom I adore), began my senior year in high school, quit my job of a year and a half, and gotten behind in all aspects of my life.

When I started to feel the stress building from the essays and reading and math homework that was actually due on top of coordinating choir events as one of the choir co-presidents and working at the golf course, I forgot one major thing: God is there to take my burdens away, not to add to them.

When my entire being wanted to forfeit all of my previous or set engagements for the entire year and just drive up to Washington (which would never happen because, knowing me, I wouldn't be able to get to Portland without having an anxiety attack), someone asked me a simple question that altered the way I look at my life, "Have you done your Jesus time today?"

Rather than seeing my life as a bedraggled mess full of stressful requirements for colleges, school, choir, work, and home, I began to untangle everything. Each night since that simple question, I have taken a few minutes to at least read a passage from the Bible, reflect, and pray on what I read (or simply on my feelings about the day or moment).

At first, it took significant motivation- I am not saying that I don't continue to struggle with motivating myself to have daily Jesus time, just that it has gotten easier- Jesús, my boyfriend, would ask each night if I had had my Jesus time and I would sigh or "harumph" and pull out my Bible. Now, even if he hasn't asked yet, I will start to open up my Bible and dive into His Word out of routine.

Why complain, argue, and cry after a long day rather than opening up your Bible to seek His advice? <- That is a question I have asked myself over and over again.

When I find myself struggling with motivation to do assignments for school or work related to other aspects of my life, what helps the most is to take a step back and breathe. 

Oh, and smile.

Images found on google images. No copyright intended.

Savior, Please

"I try to be so tough

But I'm just not strong enough

I can't do this alone, 
God I need You to hold on to me

I try to be good enough

But I'm nothing without Your love

Savior, please keep saving me"

Driving along, this song came on the radio. How many times have you tried to live your life all for yourself without any help? I know that I struggle with control over pretty much anything I do.

But, no matter how much we try to console ourselves and defend our actions, we are still attempting the impossible. 

God is here for us, yet we still try to live for ourselves.

After the first time I heard it, I had been listening to this song non-stop. Okay, maybe a little less frequently, but still. Please take the time to listen to it "Savior, Please" by Josh Wilson, it may open your heart to something God wants to say.

Cleaning My Heart

     I went on a little journey today. I realized a sin in my life, getting caught up in worldly living, and I was confronted about it. I went through a lot of emotional turmoil in the aftermath.

     In this realization, I went to the Bible and came across the passage 1 John 1:8-10 which reads, "If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make Him out to be a liar and His Word has no place in us."

     Even in my brokenness, He is faithful and forgiving. I don't deserve His love.

     I took the time to sit outside in my backyard for some quiet time of reflection. I sat next to a flowerbed, if it can even be called that, full of weeds and without even realizing it, I began to pull the weeds, one by one, from the soil. This was a significant moment for me because I realized the analogy with my own life. At that moment, I was figuratively plucking the weeds from my heart. But, I wasn't alone. He was there, helping me, cleaning my heart alongside me.

     I was listening to (and belting out) Hillsong United's "Search My Heart", "Bones", and "Forever Reign". He truly was searching my heart and cleaning out the bad. Sections of lyrics really stuck out to me and hit me right in the heart...

"You took the cross, You took my shame

Restored my life, Lord, I will follow You..."

"Without you I am nothing"

"...You are true even in my wandering"

"Take me as I am,

Awaken my heart to beat again"

     After those moments singing and pulling weeds, I turned to my left to see a manifestation of God providing for us. There stood a blueberry bush. I proceeded to pick blueberries and pop them into my mouth, savoring the glorious blue fruit. 

     In a way, the flowerbed was my heart and the blueberries were the visual representation that God forgives me and loves me. After that powerful moment, I couldn't not share it. 

     Take my life as an example... When you realize a sin in your life, you may not need to pull weeds in your backyard to clean your heart, but whatever you do, know He is there for you to forgive you and comfort you. He will wipe those blemishes from your heart. Bring anything and everything to Him and the experience you have may surprise you. 

Are you comfortable?

Yesterday, Seth King, youth pastor at Countryside Christian Church led a very moving discussion about living as a Christian. The big questions were, "Are you living like you need God? Like you need the Bible?" and, "What are you doing for Christ that makes you uncomfortable?".

Well, these questions got me thinking. Have I been living the cushy life? I have food on the table multiple times a day, I have a home, I have a job and transportation... what am I missing? If I went on with life right now but didn't acknowledge God, would I be able to survive? I think I might. That isn't a good sign.

As a Christian, it is my responsibility to the world to live like Christ and to live like I need Him. If I am not following that, then what am I doing that is for Christ?

That's where things need to change. I'm guessing that many of us like to have life planned out to an extent. We have a plan for the future and we have an ideal lifestyle. Well, what if all of those things that we deem as within our "comfort zone" and within our plan for life began to change?

I suppose talking to people about Christ isn't something all of us find easy and like an everyday sort of occurence. If that's you, like it is me, then maybe we need to start branching out a bit. Sharing the Good News isn't always such a daunting task. Pray about it, ask God to give you the strength you need to bring about change in your circle of influence. Maybe you will end up planting the seed in someone's heart that turns into that tree. That tree could end up sharing God's message with more and more people, planting seeds here and there in the hearts of others.

Imagine one tiny apple seed - that's all it takes to plant a tree. So, if we take the time to plant seeds in people's hearts throughout our lives - maybe just one every month or just as it comes - then the people around us will see our likeness in Christ and that we love people. And that love will spread into more figurative trees.

If you are having trouble with this concept, take a moment to picture someone planting a seed... if you feel like you lack the proper tools to plant seeds in people's hearts, take a moment to ask God for the strength, wisdom, words, or anything you may need to work on to be able to be that disciple of the Lord. "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and him to who knocks, the door will be opened." Matt. 7:7

Then, like the disciples of the Lord from the Bible, maybe a seed that you plant will grow into a beautiful tree, one that has branches to plant seeds in more hearts than you yourself could reach. That is the goal here. If we all step just a bit out of our comfort zones to talk to one or two people every once in a while or just act like Christ, we may be able to plant seeds to grow into trees to spread to more and more people. And just like that, God's Good News can spread beyond our wildest dreams.

Now, what do you think of that? If we all live like we need Christ and step a bit out of our comfort zones, we could reach numerous people with His Word! And even if we only reach one heart, then everything, all of the uncomfortable situations, are worth it.

So, what do you say? Are you with me? Let's go out into the world and live like Christ. Let's show the world what love is and plant some seeds! Maybe it will help one person. Maybe it will help thousands. Either way, making a difference in the Lord is worth everything.

*Pictures found via google images

*Matthew 7:7

To Him be the glory...

"If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To Him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen." ~ 1 Peter 4:11

Rather than saying whatever we want, Peter reminds us that our words and actions are reflective of God. 

People see us Christians as people of God, which we all are, and that should be motivation enough to have our words and actions glorify Him. 

Someone may see our actions or hear our words and turn away from God or maybe turn towards Him depending on what we portray Christianity as. 

So, keep this in mind the next time you are about to act or speak foolishly. Changing your ways may change a life.

Surrender

"Let the morning bring me word of Your unfailing love, 

for I have put my trust in You.

Show me the way I should go, 

for to You I lift up my soul.

Rescue me from my enemies, O Lord, 

for I hide myself in You.

Teach me to do Your will,

for You are my God;

may Your good Spirit

lead me on level ground.

For Your name's sake, O Lord, preserve my life;

in Your righteousness, bring me out of trouble.

In Your unfailing love, silence my enemies;

destroy all my foes,

for I am Your servant." 

~Psalm 143:8-12

When I feel like I am drowning in a sea of homework, chores, work, choir, friendships, church, life... I need to let it all go. 

I NEED to give it all to Him. 

He looks down upon me as I lay awake thinking, pondering my life and what I should do next. 

It saddens Him when I try to do everything on my own. 

He is there for me. He is there for YOU! Why just sit here struggling to even start the next task when you can drop everything and run to His arms? 

Exactly. There is no real reason why other than the fact that you need to feel that control, you want to know what comes next, His power scares you. No, it terrifies you. 

Why would you want to let go when you're doing so well? Think for a minute. 

I'm in that spot, too. I know what you're feeling. God is there for us. We don't have everything under control. It ISN'T going well. Life has pulled the rug out from under us as we try to keep out balance with everything in life. 

When I read this passage today, I felt guilt. I have been keeping all of my troubles from God. No, I haven't hid anything from Him, I just haven't surrendered it all. I may have given a piece here or a bit there, but I haven't given Him everything. And that is my problem. I need to be like David. I need to tell God that I am His servant, that I need his unfailing love, that I cannot do this without Him. 

God is there for me and He is there for you. Why wait and try to hold on for another moment when He has His hand outstretched to you? 

Just give it to Him. 

Surrender.